Who I Am.....

Ya know....People always are asking...expecially when in a life such as mine..."who are you really" my typical every day life consists of so much stress and trauma that those that know me know who I truly am....I'm me...I'm intelligent yet ditzy, centered yet scatterbrained, a flight risk, afraid of falling and even more afraid of failure, I'm determined yet at times unmotivated, I'm the life of the party and the wallflower, I'm complex yet very simple to understand, I'm everything and nothing, I'm harmony and disaster, pleasure and pain, meek yet vocal,the best of both worlds. I will try my damnest to get inside someone's head and find out what makes them who they are, but when I first started doing that I realised that along the way I had lost who I was, during that time of me finding ME again is when I realised all of the things written above, so honestly to all of those who ask me who me I am that cannot be answered in a simple way.
In the Lifestyle it takes a strong man to hold me and an even stronger one to keep me. I'm not a doormat, I'm honest I'm brutially honest at times to the point it will hurt feelings and I don't mean to, I'm naturally a submissive person my job just requires a strong domineering personality to come thru and rear its ugly head thru me and I hate it so much. When I am submitting to someone I feel power I know that makes no sense at all but I feel as though I am in sync with myself, like I am being true to me and not hiding behind a foggy curtian of what society deems to be true and proper. because I don't know what "normal" is, being me is normal to me. so as for my first entry there ya go, if you understood it awesome, if not well I'm sorry and I tried....